There’s been a lot of talk lately about the heroism of front-line medical workers — and for good reason.
Doctors, nurses, PAs, and a whole host of specialists and support staff put themselves in harms way to ensure that sick people get the medical care they need.
They work long hours, shoulder an enormous amount of stress, and expose themselves to a greater risk of infection — putting the needs of others ahead of their own.
They are super humans, without a doubt. But, they’re not superhuman.
Let me explain:
See, a lot of us grow up thinking that the world works like this: We get sick, we go to the doctor, and the doctor makes us better. Doctors have special tools (magic?) and medicine (good medicine!) that makes us well again.
If you have young kids like I do, you probably play some version of this game with dolls, or dinosaurs: 1. Dino gets sick —> 2. Dino goes to doctor —> 3. Doctor makes Dino all better.
We don’t know exactly how it works. And we don’t care! Making people better, it’s just what doctors do.
It’s a fun game to play. And, some of us (the lucky ones) can go on believing this story for a long time. If only it were so simple in real life…
Unfortunately, in the real world — despite their heroism and expertise — at the end of the day, doctors are mere mortals, just like us. They have awesome powers, but they don’t have superpowers.
They’re making educated, informed decisions, based on a variety of — often complicated — factors. They have years of education, training, and experience; they also work long hours, and manage heavy caseloads — each with their own unique set of variables they must consider in determining the best course of treatment. We often talk in terms of “treatment options”, because there are multiple courses of action to consider.
And while doctors can provide us with expert opinions and help us weigh the pros and cons of various options, ultimately the responsibility is on us, as patients, to make decisions regarding our own healthcare.
That’s why it’s so critical that we, as patients and caregivers, embrace our role as leaders of our own care teams, and recognize the critical importance of self-advocacy.
The National Coalition for Cancer Survivorship sums it up nicely in their self-advocacy handbook (emphasis my own):
Self-advocacy does not mean that you have to wave a banner, give speeches or take to the ramparts [….] it means that you arm yourself with the tools and skills necessary to feel comfortable about asserting yourself and communicating clearly about your needs. It means that you are taking responsibility and assuming some control of your life circumstances with cancer.
Self-advocacy means:
Asking your questions — all of them. Writing them down in advance of your appointment, and asking people to repeat themselves when you don’t understand.
Taking notes. Or asking a friend or family member to take notes for you. Or recording audio of your visit for easy play back as-needed. (As a courtesy, it’s nice to inform your doctor before hand if you plan to do this).
Requesting a second opinion when you believe you need one — and not feeling guilty, or apologizing for it.
Knowing what your needs are, and doing everything in your power to ensure those needs are being met.
Cancer.net also has some good tips on taking charge of your care — and it’s not just for cancer patients.
Let go of the myth that your doctor is Superwoman or Superman, and take the lead.
Embrace your role as a leader of your care team, and be your own biggest advocate. Your life may very well depend on it.